Dear Honest/Nice/Beloved Lady at Michael's,
Thank you for turning in my wallet today when you found it in the shopping cart. You restored/strengthened my confidence in the human race.
Even though you are no longer making new episodes, I just ran into a re-run of you on TV. Even though I didn't watch you faithfully, I kinda miss your quirky self. You remind me of a very exaggerated me. I can relate just enough to make me laugh. And hyper-ventilate a little.
An Anxious Fan
Dear Garbage Man,
You came just a little too early this morning. I was in the process of depositing all of the debris from the big storm earlier in the week into the black barrel when you showed up. I put out what I had finished. I continued cleaning up and nearly filled the barrel again. Realizing you hadn't come to the houses across the street, I rolled it over there and in a few minutes you picked up my garbage again. That is what I call getting my taxpayer's money's worth. Much obliged.
Dear Vogue Pattern,
You are kind of making me crazy. I approached you with confidence, but you are not nice. Who on earth designed you, anyway? An overachiever with way too much creative energy who was trying too hard, that's who. Seriously. Get a grip. Be normal.
Dear Pumpkin on My Porch,
Your twinkling goodness pretty much makes my Halloween.
Dear Valley Fever,
We've had quite a ride, you and I. It is time to be done. Take your scars, pack your little fungi, and get out of town. K? K. I want me back.