Monday, April 5, 2010

Underwear for the House

I hate buying underwear for my house. You know, those items that nobody really sees, but they sustain and support the workings of the house. Things like appliances, roofs, water heaters, hoses, sprinkler repair parts, mattresses, plumbing, electrical, lawnmowers, trimmers, printers, computers, air conditioners, etc. etc. The list is endless. Endless, I tell you.

Today my washer died. RIP washer. You have washed about a million thousand bazillion loads for me over the last 12 years. Your almond colored goodness doesn't owe me a single penny. And yet, you are underwear. Now dead underwear. And you failed me. And I had to go buy more underwear tonight.

We had to replace your helpmate (dryer) several months ago. At least you can go to laundry heaven and be together. And my underwear will at least match again! It's been bugging me, a white dryer and an almond washer. Bugging. Hardcore. But that's how much I hate buying underwear. I waited till you made that unearthly noise this morning so as to avoid buying more underwear than I absolutely needed.

You served me well, you little almond beauty. If my new underwear serves me as well as you did, I'll be almost 70 when I have to toddle down to the store and buy more.

Now THAT is a horrid thought.

11 comments:

The Wizzle said...

LOL! I have the funniest mother-in-law on the face of the Earth. I hope you are still feeling awesome when you are 70. Don't really want to think about that.

And I hope you thoroughly enjoy your new matching house undies! I am so vain, but I do love a matching set.

runningfan said...

When I read the title of the post, I knew it would be entertaining. You didn't disappoint!

Kate said...

I am laughing so hard right now. You are the funniest. Also, yes, you're part of that immediate-family-feeling group. Which is why I totally relate to your hatred of buying underwear for your house. I'm quickly learning to hate it too! ;)

Unknown said...

I like to buy house undies, except when they all fail at the same time. Which is inevitable. :) Murphy's law..which I wish never was invented. Congrats on your A. We have a cutout of Obama that scares me all the time. And our visitors. :)

neeners said...

You are hilarious!! You just wrote a post that everyone can relate to!! Yeah for new washers!!

angiedunn said...

you are my favorite person. this post cracked me up! soooooooooo true!!

still laughing, hahahahaha......

Kara said...

So funny, my NetNanny blocked your site saying it was in the forbidden category: Lingerie! Once I unblocked it, I understood why!! Betcha never thought you'd post something that had to be filtered!!

girlygirl said...

Love it! Hadn't thought about house items in that way before--total crack-up! :) Thanks for sharing!

Emily Moffat said...

Granny,

I hope you don't mind, but I had to pop over to your blog and thank you for all the lovely comments you make on my sister's blog. You are such a rockin' mom-in-law, it always makes me feel so good to read your sweet thoughts to her.

And since I was here, I read a post or two of yours, and was just as delighted! Now I know where Angie gets it. You are too fun! We should do lunch or something! ;)

Jordyn Perkins said...

Oh you are amazing! Quite the talented writer, and now I can totally see where Holly gets her creative genius! ;) For real. And you made me laugh, and I love your blog. :) AND, we will miss you all, very, very much.

angiedunn said...

um, i just read this again.

my mom is hilarious!